anxiety

Many things are causing me anxiety these days and while I would love to pretend everything is "fabulous" its simply not true.

1) Moving - While I am so excited to move and start school and have a new adventure part of me worries if it is the wrong decision. I will be leaving my family, friends, job and everything that is familiar. I get anxious thinking I will be oh so lonely, that after being out of school for a year and that it will be more difficult that I imagined. I will miss my friends and family and especially Byran. Its hard to know what decision is the right decision and if in fact you are making it. While I feel like it is the right decision for me, it does not come without apprehension.

2) Buying a couch - What a dumb thing to feel anxious about! But I have had nightmares about purchasing a couch, I have spent countless hours pursing the internet wondering what type of couch I should purchase. For every positive review about one I find that I like there seems to be a negative... and it sends me in a downward spiral of doubt about what I should buy. Should I purchase a cheap couch or should I spring for something more expensive that will last longer? Why is this causing me so much anxiety. For me a couch represents comfort and relaxation, and being in a new environment those seems like two things I will need which brings me back to my anxiety about moving and being in a new environment.

3) Marathon Training - I committed to too much this summer, I finked around and I didn't train as much as I did last summer. I am starting to get it together and truth me told I always feel under trained and under prepared when it comes time to run the marathon but thinking about completing 26.2 miles in October terrifies me. I have to keep reminding myself that I have done it  before and I will do it again. Run through the pain ... right?

In the end I know everything will be alright, but I think I will feel better once I am there and know I can make it instead of anticipating all that can go wrong. Hurray up September 15th, I am ready to get it over with already!

I'll See You in the Walla Walla

Its official, I am moving to Walla Walla for Graduate school. I will live there for approximately one year while I complete my M.S.W. and then it will be back to Salt Lake City. I am moving on September 15 and have found the cutest duplex. I am so excited for all the new adventures to be had. I am also excited to be done with my education. Other Exciting (Running) News: Indian Summer Half Marathon in the Tri-Cities on September 22: I am debating signing up for this run. It would be my first half in my new location. But I may or may not still have company while moving and I have never ran an event without knowing someone was near by in case something happened. That being said I think it would be a great way to explore my surroundings and to get a training run in. Nike Women's Marathon on October 14th: last year I ran the half and this year I will be running the full. It is an incredible event, I can't wait to add to my "bling" collection and also to travel to San Francisco and spend time with my mom, aunt and grandma. The Walla Walla Crush 10K on October 20: This is again tentative as I may be too sore from the marathon the week before that I will most likely be under-trained for but we'll see. I would also love to find a race near-by to run on Thanksgiving since I will not be able to go home this year. So i'll be keeping my eye out for that.

Some sweet pictures from last year's NWM Half:

Vegas Vacation

I returned from Vegas today, I had such a wonderful time its always a bummer to be home... but they'll be other vacations.

Day 1: Friday

My mom and I drove to Vegas on Friday morning for the Amica 19.7 half marathon  at Lake Las Vegas. Friday night we stayed in the The Ravella it was one of the official race hotels, it was surprisingly pretty for a man-made lake but ridiculously hot. Like 108 degrees... um no thanks! We picked up my grandma, checked into the hotel, swam and then carbo-loaded at The Luna Rossa, it was delicious.

Day 2: Saturday

The next morning I woke up at 5:45 to get ready for the 6:30am start, I checked the temperature on my phone and it was already 90 degrees. Yikes! The previous Monday I ran the Memorial Day half, and my knee was giving me trouble, that combined with the heat helped me make the decision to drop down to the 10k. It was a relatively small race with the primary event being a triathlon the following day. I am so happy I dropped down, the temperatures rose steadily and it was an extremely hilly course. I texted my mom to let her know the change in plans and met her 6.2 miles later at the finish. I finished in 1:18, a 12:33 pace.

My "Bling"

After the race we ate breakfast, gathered our things and headed back to my grandma's house... I was exhausted from waking up so early so we lounged allowed for the majority of the day (which was lovely) and then went shopping at Nordstrom Rack were I scored a pair of jeans, two shirts, some nail polish and the bargain of the day... a pair of Red Wedged Toms for $25.00! They had been worn and refurbished returned hence the deal. How I love deals (and the rack)! 

After we returned from our shopping adventure we went out to dinner with my Uncle and some of his friends at King's Fish House, I got my usual post run meal of Cheeseburger & Fries then headed over to Ben & Jerry's for a million samples and three different to-go cups: cherry garcia, late night snack (which has fudge covered potato chips in it) and Coffee Coffee BuzzBuzzBuzz. 

Day 3: Sunday

Sunday morning started with Dunkin Donuts & Starbucks and then we headed out for a day on the strip. We went to the Mirage to see Siegfried and Roy's Secret Garden  home to dolphins and large cats. The dolphins were AMAZING, you were so close and they looked so happy and peaceful swimming around. It was another scorching day and it took everything I had not to jump into the pool with them. 

After visting with the dolphins we headed over to the large cat area, they were all asleep. They looked sad cooped up in their cages, and I really wanted to take one home.. or set them free into the wild. 

"I'm locked up, they won't let me out!"

After that it was time to eat again, of course! I believe it was the theme of the trip! On the way out we passed Kardashian Khaos  where the queen herself about to do a meet & greet. Unfortunately I didn't meet Kim, however I did get to navigate my way through the 50 million other people who were waiting to do so. Really... I am glad I stuck with the dolphins. 

After navigating through the crowd we made our way to Caesars Palace  and then promptly sat down for lunch at Joe's  which was heavenly. My grandma and I split the steakhouse salad and the grilled turkey and swiss sandwiches (descriptions below) yum. 

JOE'S STEAKHOUSE SALAD
with Grilled Vegetables, Goat Cheddar

& Roasted Tomato Vinaigrette

GRILLED TURKEY AND SWISS

with Bacon, Tomato & Louis Dressing

After we finished eating we went and explored the Forum Shops, we tried on vintage inspired clothing at Bettie Paige Clothing they were so adorable and then window shopped and lusted over designer clothes. 

Kate Spade 

Juicy Couture 

Louis Vuitton 

Tiffany &CO. 

Next we walked through the casino and out the doors making our way to Serendipity 3 , a restaurant that sells delicious ice cream treats. where we were able to split a frozen hot chocolate. MMMMM

After that we headed back to my grandma's house to relax, swim and eat dinner.
Then back to the SLC

24

Today I turn 24... so long to 23. I am sad to see it go 23 ended up being an amazing year, I was able to do and complete so many things I never thought I would accomplish. This year I ran three half marathons, two marathons, graduated from college, I got to visit Dublin and London, and overall start to feel like I have some real direction in life. When I graduated from high school, I went completely off the deep end I had no idea what I was doing and I was just a mess in general. I was afraid the same thing would happen when I graduated from college so I threw myself into running knowing I needed something to keep me afloat. It ended up being something truly remarkable, and has bettered my life in so many ways. I was the girl who dreaded gym class and would skip it for any reason possible.. today I can now say...

So much changed for me in my 23rd year, I feel like 24 can't beat it but I do have some exciting things to look forward to this year. The Salt Lake Marathon on April 21st, The NWM Marathon in October and possible the NY marathon in November. Last my not least my ultimate goal of finally leaving UT, hopefully will happen. I am applying to graduate school at Walla Walla University the deadline is June 1st so hopefully I'll be able to stop procrastinating like I have done all year for school and get my application in on time. 

So as far as plans for my birthday go, I do have to work awhile, then dinner at Mazza... the most delicious place to eat.  Other then that relaxing and reading the hunger games. Sounds pretty perfect. 

I am obsessed with the Hunger Games, after seeing the movie I am reading the book with a vengeance. 

...

It has been forever and a day since I have posted on here, things got way too busy and it fell to the wayside. I think the easiest way to update you all is to make a list:

• I graduated from the University of Utah in August with a degree in Social Work
• I ran the NWM 1/2 Marathon in October
• I ran the Dublin Marathon on October 31
• I no longer work at Odyssey House (thank my lucky stars)
• I work PRN at The Montessori School of Salt Lake and Cancer Wellness House and PRN at Highland Ridge
• I moved in with Byran officially in July

Things I am looking forward too:

• applying to graduate school out of state
• running the LA and Salt Lake Marathon in the spring
• going to Disneyland with Benton on vacation
• finding a full time job
• The Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving

Tarantism Thursday...

It's only 10:00 AM and I have already accomplished more today then I usually do before noon. For some reason I woke up at 5:45 AM... this is very unusual for me, I guess its because I passed out on the couch around 11:30 PM last night and my body is incapable of sleeping for more then 4-5 hours. I eventually gave in to the realization that I was not going to fall back asleep and got my ass out of bed. I had to do a 3 mile run today so I decided to get it out of the way before the heat hit ... when I started at 8:00 AM it was 75 degrees, I hate heat. I finished 3.10 miles in/37:40 averaging 12:08/mile... not to bad by my standard. Now I have 4 hours with nothing to do before I head to my internship, I'm not used to spare time so I'm not quite sure what to do with myself?! My word for the day is tarantism which means a nervous disorder characterized by an uncontrollable impulse to dance; popularly attributed to bite of the southern European tarantula or wolf spider. I find myself often with a uncontrollable urge to dance at the supermarket, when I'm running, walking to my car, sitting in class, maybe I was bit by a spider? Just looking at that picture makes me shudder!!

 Do you ever find yourself dancing uncontrollably at inappropriate times? 

All the time much to the embarrassment of those around me - unless its my mom, aunt or grandma they usually join in. Maybe it runs in the genes

 

How do you feel about spiders? 

I do not like spiders they freak me out, I also disturbed by the fact or myth that we will swallow spiders in our sleep. Bluck

monday...

Happy Motivation Monday!

I think the below picture portrays my thoughts accurately

word.

My week got off to a crappy start yesterday when I...

Locked my Keys in the car

Almost lost my iphone because I left it on my trunk while driving

Had terrible allergies that prevented ultimate sleeping

attempted to run yesterday but was too sore

crazy sore throat that won't go away

my ifitness belt still hasn't arrived... I ordered it a month ago

there were some good things that happened this weekend though...

I completed my Saturday 6 miler at my goal pace
 I got new pillows at a ridiculous cheap price
Ordered a magic bullet from Macy's for 29.99
they were having a discount weekend because I also ordered
a cute Nike Running Skirt  for $35
damn I love good deals!

No I am at my internship and a new source of frustration is occuring

the University of Utah's website keeps timing out so I cannot access the things I need

 to finish my project.

Seriously I have been trying to use it for an hour...

Argh.

And finally today's word of the day is ...

malinger 

which means: to feign sickness in order to avoid duty or work

an example would be....

I wish I would have pulled a malinger this Monday.

for anybody out there that actually reads this... 

Have you ever faked sickness aka malingered to avoid work or school?

I used to do it all the time when I was in elementary school/middle school... but the time I got to high school I realized I could just not show up and the only thing that would occur was an automated phone call. I never call in sick to work, I get to nervous even when I am actually sick.

What excuse did you use?

Mom: I threw up, I have a fever, my allergies are really bad